Not So Silent Water
Where else would I be
than here, on quiet water?
The water not so quiet,
carries songs of birds.
All around me is a chorus
led by cardinal’s cheerful call.
Calling out much louder,
tufted titmouse responds.
Trilling out its lonely answer,
a kingfisher passes by.
Turtles leave before I pass,
break the water with a splash.
With such sounds to break the silence,
Where else would I be?
This is my response to Day 27 at napowrimo.net, where we are asked to write a “duplex,” which is a variation on the sonnet, developed by the poet Jericho Brown. Maureen Thorsen describes it this way:
“It’s organized into seven, two-line stanzas. The second line of the first stanza is echoed by (but not identical to) the first line of the second stanza, the second line of the second stanza is echoed by (but not identical to) the first line of the third stanza, and so on. The last line of the poem is the same as the first.
rivrvlogr 
Really, really well done! I wish I could be in that sort of place right now.
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Thank you. 🙂 I’m sure you’d love it.
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Excellent duplex
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Thanks, Paul.
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Very welcome Ken
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I like this one, Ken. It flows beautifully and you don’t make the repetitions blunt and obvious. They are more hints, echoes so they don’t interrupt the flow.
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Thank you, Jane. I figured this was less about repetition and – as you said – more about hints of that.
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Subtlety makes this form more interesting, I think.
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Where else ? And I agree with Jane about the flow.. (k)
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Thank you. 😀 Yes, where else?
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Lovely–and immersive!💜🍃
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Thank you.
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You’d probably be somewhere that wasn’t as nice. Lovely, Ken! 🙂
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Thank you, Susi. 🙂
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You’re welcome, Ken! 🙂
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