New Leaves Wait to Grow
It was an easy decision for me, when I decided to move to Missouri. I was following my heart to be with the woman I love. If we were going to be together, it was much easier for me to make the move than it would have been for her. Still not yet sixty (I had retired at fifty-three), I had no job to hold me back.
I gave a lot of thought to being away from my children and reasoned that it would be no different than if they were to move away after completing college. My eldest son had attended university in Cleveland and had a job there as a computer engineer. My other son still lived in the Buffalo area, working in IT for a web hosting firm, and wasn’t afraid to travel himself. Meanwhile, my daughter was in college, and there were no guarantees that she would stay in the area once she completed school. Since then, she has become a high school counselor, and all three have stayed in their respective cities.
It’s 700 miles to Cleveland, and another 200 miles further on to Buffalo, and I’ve driven those roads to visit them at least twenty times in the past eight years. I don’t mind the drive. We have a great time when we’re together, and we’ve even had them as guests when they’ve visited us.
When my granddaughter arrived (two years ago, next month), I realized there was something I hadn’t anticipated. Grandchildren unexpected? No, but I hadn’t thought about how much I would be missing, over the miles. Now, I saw her (and held her!) a few times in the first year, and there have been many video calls, but it’s been nearly eleven months since I’ve actually seen her.
And now, my daughter is expecting her first child in three weeks. Meanwhile, due to the COVID-19 infection rate, Missouri has been on the out-of-state travel ban list for New York State for months-on-end and flirts off-and-on with the slightly less stringent restrictions for Ohio.
I am where my heart has taken me, but I wonder. If I knew then what I know now, would I have considered the move a folly?
old leaves fall
new leaves wait to grow
left behind
This haibun is my response to dVerse – Poetics #427 – Mussenden’s Temple,
the prompt from Lisa at dVerse ~ Poets Pub, with the prompt
to write a poem using the word folly.
It’s not easy to foresee that travel could be banned for such a long time… and it seems like restrictions are coming back again.
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A second wave has been predicted, an it looks like it has started.
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It’s difficult to examine all facets of a situation and satisfy every aspect. Pros and cons, lights and shadows of every thing that is. The grandkids thing is a biggie. I’m positive things wouldn’t be as compromised without this blasted pandemic, and the clock is ticking. Am really hoping we can see a viable vaccine soon. Poignant haiku 😦
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Thank you, Lisa.Thank you, Lisa. We do our best, one day at a time.
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YWx2
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You speak for many at this time, Ken! I think we all make the best choice we can when we have to move for example (especially for love). This pandemic has highlighted family separations at crucial times like deaths and births and elder care etc. It is something none of us could likely have envisioned – as you so poignantly expressed.💙
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Thank you, Lynne. Yes, I’m definitely not alone when it comes to missing loved ones.
I don’t regret the move. I guess you could say this is a lament over not having the best of both worlds.
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Over here in england the physical distances are not as large but the gulf emotionly of not seeing family is just as big. Fingers crossed it wont be to much longer. my little brother who lives in lousiville, kentuky does seem half aworld away.
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Its a problem for many people, even those as close as being in the same town. Think of someone in a long term care facility, there for their own well being yet having to see visitors on the other side of a window. I’m happy that I have my health and that I’m with someone I love dearly. If only I could have more.
Thank you.
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Oh this is one lush write, KG. And it’s true: so many of us are in that same boat with you. Your last sentence, followed by the killer haiku drives this baby home. Well done!
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Thanks, Ron. Yeah, this is a lament as much as anything else, but I know I’m not alone.
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So much here, Ken. I certainly don’t think it was folly to be with the woman you love, even if you can’t be with your grandchildren. It’s a sad situation though–the distance and then the added restrictions.
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Thank you, Merril.
Yes, if if this situation could have been foreseen, who could imagine it would be for so long? Ohio is on-again/off-again for NY’s travel ban. My son lives outside of Cleveland, just 130 miles from New York, but it might as well be a thousand miles for the grandparents in that direction.
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We haven’t seen older daughter’s house in western MA yet, and we just finally got together outside with younger daughter at her house. I haven’t seen my sisters since before all this started. . . we’re all trying to be cautious. Sigh.
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Your words are a reminder that everything comes with a price. Luckily love can fly across miles even if we can’t. I am touched by your obvious love for all your family.
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Thank you, Claudia. At least there’s Skype & Zoom.
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This haibun tugs strongly upon my heart, I so hope that Covid situation is under control soon and that loved ones are reunited. 💝
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Thank you, Sanaa. I guess patience is the answer.
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A nice haibun and many ask the same questions. Every decision is a risk. Hope things loosen up soon so you can see your grandkids.
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Thank you, Mary. I keep watching those numbers. With a tentative trip to Ohio to see my son’s family on Nov. 1 (the MO/OH numbers permitting), I’ll watch the OH/NY numbers. If those are good after 14 days, I’ll make it into NY in time to meet my new granddaughter. Meanwhile, (again, numbers permitting), at least I’ll have that visit in Ohio.
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Oh, to have the option to simply teleport …
and be immune to COVID and its kin to come …
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Sign me up!
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Oh so tough to be separated from family at this time. It sounds like you made the right decision, following your heart – children will grow up and go there own way but I hope you are reunited soon!
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Thank you, Ingrid. It’s just a matter of biding my time. Patience. Sigh.
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This is so fitting for our times, the madness of the year we’ll never forget, though probably wish we could. Perfect haiku to finish.
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Thank you. 🙂
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The haiku says it all. We do what we have to do and need to do. None of us can predict the future or control the hearts and desires of our children.
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Thank you, Jane.
And so true.
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🙂
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The move wasn’t a folly, Ken. How could you know what the future could hold back then? I could say the same thing about moving from London to Norfolk all those years ago now that I can’t see my grandson as much as I would love to. At least I get to see him on-line and I know that we are both safe. You have successful children with lives of their own and I’m sure they don’t begrudge you your new life. Love the haiku!
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🙂 Thank you, Kim. Yes, at least there are video calls.
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The pandemic has proved a folly to many of our decisions. That does not make the results any easier to live with though. (K)
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I know that plenty of people have worries that are worse than mine. I also know I’m lucky to have what I do have. What I need is patience.
Thank you, Kerfe.
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Patience…I haven’t learned that yet either.
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We went through the same thing – reasoned that the kids jobs could take them anywhere – and then along came grandchildren….sigh. Can’t wait till we hug them again.
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Patience, right, V.J.? I need to remind myself that fretting won’t accomplish anything.
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It’s so hard. Trust would be good too.
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Yes, what should come naturally.
Thank you, V.J.
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Welcome
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I certainly hope you get to see that new baby. Travel in these times of plague are sketchy at best. My wife has been back in Ohio for over a month and is due to return to us in the Pacific Northwest shortly after Thanksgiving. I have found a place for her to be tested for COVID-19 prior to her boarding the plane, but I am still concerned for her and for us as she reenters our household. It’s unfortunate to feel this way, but the world has made things scary. I wish you will Ken.
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Thanks, Rob. I tested last week as a precaution – negative. I decided to leave for Ohio on Sunday and take my chances on qualifying for NY (from Ohio). As I drove, NY’s governor made stricter requirements for out-of-state travelers that I think I can actually meet – due to having just tested. I’m visiting with one granddaughter now and hope to see the new one, very soon.
https://rivrvlogr.com/2020/11/02/on-the-road-again-finally/
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Oh, I love this piece, Ken! You’ve really touched on the “cycle of life” with your thoughts. ❤
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Thank you, Susi.
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You’re welcome! 🙂
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Reblogged this on I Write Her and commented:
And the cycle of life continues…
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Thank you for sharing this, Susi.
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It’s totally my pleasure, Ken! 🙂
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