Sonnet CXVI ~ Refuted

Sonnet CXVI – Refuted

Admit impediments. Love is not not love.
True minds concede the end of a marriage
They need not wait for some sign from above.
To do so would be a gross miscarriage.
We knew that our bond had long lost its spark,
Letting years pass, so sadly mistaken,
As we continued our misguided lark,
Going to depths that left our souls shaken.
Biding our time took the blush off our days,
Till it left nothing for our hearts to hold.
Years soon meant nothing for hearts gone astray,
our only reward now two hearts left cold.
     Thus we resolved the only solution:
     Our life as one became dissolution.

The prompt for Day 27 is to “remix” a Shakespearean sonnet. I’ve taken Shakespeare’s Sonnet CXVI, starting with its second line as genesis and using many of the lines as cues, with my ancient history. I may have written sonnets before, but this certainly feels like the first, and then only on the coattails of a master. Here is the original sonnet by Shakespeare:

Sonnet CXVI

     Let me not to the marriage of true minds
     Admit impediments. Love is not love
     Which alters when it alteration finds,
     Or bends with the remover to remove:
     O, no! it is an ever-fixed mark,
     That looks on tempests and is never shaken;
     It is the star to every wandering bark,
     Whose worth’s unknown, although his height be taken.
     Love’s not Time’s fool, though rosy lips and cheeks
     Within his bending sickle’s compass come;
     Love alters not with his brief hours and weeks,
     But bears it out even to the edge of doom.
                    If this be error and upon me prov’d,
                    I never writ, nor no man ever lov’d.

Image source:


Fear the Hunter

Starlight Plea
Majestic stag that roams this moonlit night
A rather deadly shaft does bear your name
Heed my warning: hurry now and take flight
Flee from this priv’leged hunter seeking game

On the hunt, day and night, for likely prey
Within these woods, upon his regal steed
His aim is seldom known to go astray
Be ever watchful now, great stag – take heed

You are no longer safe here, in your home
No matter if break of day or sundown
Be careful now, wherever you may roam
This daring prince would gladly seize your crown

Trophy soon in hand; nothing left to chance
Guided by the stars, is his blessed lance

This is my second response to Jane Dougherty’s Weekly Poetry Challenge #40 Rider, with Prince Riding in Moonlight, by John Bauer.  Star is the only one of her suggested words I have used.  After writing poetry for more than twenty-five years, I’ve attempted my first sonnet (except for a previous Kyrielle sonnet).  I’m not so sure how well I’ve followed meter, but I think I’ve adhered to the Shakespearean sonnet form by taking a sudden turn in the third quatrain and summarizing with the final couplet.  (My first response is here.)
Sonnet ~ a poem consisting of 14 lines (iambic pentameter), 10 syllables each, with a                 particular rhyming scheme:
             ~ #1) abab cdcd efef gg
             ~ #2) abba cddc effe gg
             ~ #3) abba abba cdcd cd
             ~ A Shakespearean (English) sonnet has three quatrains and a couplet, and rhymes                abab cdcd efef gg.
             ~ An Italian sonnet is composed of an octave, rhyming abbaabba, and a sestet,                rhyming cdecde or cdcdcd, or in some variant pattern, but with no closing couplet.                Also, 11 syllables possible per line.
             ~ French sonnets follow in this same pattern, but normally have 12 syllables per line.

This poem started out as four quatrains of short rhyming couplets:

Majestic stag in the night
Heed my warning and take flight
There’s a spear that bears your name
Priv’leged hunter seeking game

No longer safe in your home
Be careful now, as you roam
Break of day or at sundown
This prince would dare seize your crown

Day and night, he seeks to slay
The finest of regal prey
As he rides his stately steed
Be watchful now and take heed

Image source: Wikipedia