New Sunrise
Restless, this sleep that comes,
then doesn’t, these trying times when
memories flow like a river, then briefly,
and I feel his touch, then don’t.
That sun set long ago. Everything changed
with his extinguished light, no eyes
to flash his broad smile as darkness
seemed to close in around me.
It’s now my turn to go, knowing that,
as our hands touch once again, at last,
we will greet our first new sunrise.
The prompt for Meet the Bar by changing your perspective, from Björn at dVerse, offers this prompt: “…go out of your comfort zone and change the perspective. You can either start from a poem you’ve written before and change its perspective, or simply write from a perspective you are not used to.”
On October 29th, I wrote Last Light in response to “Tears in rain – using our senses,” from Sarah at dVerse. For this prompt, I’ve rewritten that poem and made it from the perspective of the subject of the first poem. My father died 15 years before my mother, and she was quiet, almost absent, in the last few years of her life. I tried to imagine that, with this. Please read the original, here.
this is so beautiful Ken.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you, Di. 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
This is a lovely poem, Ken.
LikeLiked by 1 person
🙂 Thank you, Robbie.
LikeLike
Given your background information, the poem was beautiful and touching. But without that info, I would have been lost — but I am a little poetically dumb (even my daughter tells me so, nowadays). Smile
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you. Björn also asked us to discuss how it felt going out of our comfort zone in writing the new poem, so I added that brief explanation at the end. But that’s all right. Poetry is as much the readers’ as it is the writer’s.
LikeLike
This is stirring. There are several I would like to join again in watching a sunrise, though I’m not ready yet to “go there” …
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you. I agree. At this point, I’m willing to wait.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I read both and I could feel the shift in perspective. It’s heart-stirring, death does seems to change people as the grief is too much. I am glad in the end they will be joined in a new light.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you. The romantic in me wants to believe that’s true.
LikeLike
This is touching, Ken…wonderful perspective!
LikeLiked by 1 person
🙂 Thank you, Lynn.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I like this one very much. Very moving.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you, Claudia.
LikeLiked by 1 person
The compression of time..beautiful. (k)
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you, Kerfe. What can seem interminable is just the blink of an eye in the grand scheme.
LikeLiked by 1 person
It is.
LikeLiked by 1 person
This is beautiful and moving, Ken. I thought at first it was about you and your dad, but I wondered about the ready to go part. 🙂 I think the poem from your mom’s perspective was very effective.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you, Merril. I’ve written from the perspective of people in the news, but I think this is the first time I’ve done it this close to my heart. The words seemed easy, but I have a hard time reading it. My mother lived with me for her last two years, and I don’t visit that time very often.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I did get this and also remember your last one… and setting yourself in your mother’s place really made it so much more moving.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you, Björn.
Reading the other responses, first person gives an intimacy that has pulled me in.
LikeLike
Nice. I admire the effort of stepping out of your comfort zone too. So very difficult for me.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you. I enjoyed the challenge.
LikeLike
Wow ken really strong. Reading them both felt like a dialogue. Really a lot of depth in this
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you so much.
LikeLike
“that sun set long ago”
beautiful
LikeLike
What a beautiful re-write Ken. You did this so well.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you, Linda. It was easier to write than I expected, but I needed a couple of days to shake off the emotional drain of it.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yes, I’m sure.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Powerful, heartfelt writing, Ken. I went back to read the original, and this is quite a different perspective.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you, Sara. The words came easily, but it wasn’t easy to write, if that makes any sense.
LikeLike
Makes a lot of sense.
LikeLiked by 1 person