showers in the night
lone cloud courting night crescent
each drop holds a moon
The challenge in Carpe Diem Crossroads #2 the summer moon is to write
a new haiku inspired by the words in two classic haiku (“fusing” them).
a thousand gallons
shower from the eaves…
cherry blossoms
Kobayashi Issa
it touches the line
of my fishing pole –
this summer moon
Fukuda Chiyo-Ni
I have taken it one step further by revising each of the original haiku,
an exercise that Kristjaan sometimes offers at Carpe Diem.
April showers
drumming on cottage roof
blossoms open
~~~~~
silent water
my pole bent by hungry fish
ripples in the moon
Image: composite of two sources at wikimedia.org, here (Issa) and here (Chiyo-Ni)
Beautiful, love the artwork to, so fitting.
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🙂 Thanks!
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Wow, Ken these haiku are so beautiful!
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Merci!
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Lovely poems, Ken.
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Thank you, Robbie.
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Delightful – all of ’em! Love “each drops holds a moon”.
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Thanks, Jazz. I find that both exercises (revising and fusing haiku) offer an advantage of another’s perspective. I don’t like to think of it as editing or correcting the original. Instead I see it as weaving that perspective into my own.
That said, let me show my anal side by correcting my own haiku. (I didn’t copy/paste my final draft when I posted.)
showers in the night
lone cloud courting pale crescent
each drop holds a moon
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Even better!
I like the blending of perspectives … opens still more perspectives in the reader of the blend.
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🙂
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You awoke the fisherman within me with that last verse. How I long to be out on the water with a bent rod . . . Thanks!
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🙂 I know how much you like fishing, Peter.
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I really like these. Classically beautiful.
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Thank you.
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This is breathtaking, Ken!
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Merci!
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Beautiful haiku Ken.
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Thank you, Janice.
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I love the one that says… each one holds a moon!
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🙂 Thank you, Frank.
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