Where to turn in this dying light,
As the sun sets with night’s approach?
All is in ruin, bridges burned,
With no clear way to set things right,
No escape as shadows encroach.
Mistakes too many to atone,
No direction, nowhere to turn,
I spend my last moments alone.
This poem is a san san, and it meets two prompts, Sue Vincent’s Thursday photo prompt – The Tower… #writephoto at Daily Echo (using her photo), and The Daily Post/Daily Prompt, which is shadow.
san san ~ 8 lines, rhyme pattern a,b,c,a,b,d,c,d
~ with 3 terms or images repeated 3 times each
(here that would be sunset, mistakes and direction)
san san: who thinks these things up? Anyway, enjoyed the poem without realizing that it was solving a puzzle . . . Good job!
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I learned of it through Jane Dougherty
https://janedougherty.wordpress.com/2016/04/20/poetry-challenge-27-san-san/
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I’m with Peter. I recognised there was a pattern but I admired it for the feeling.
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Thank you.
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I felt a build up of hopelessness and impending doom in your poetic piece. Nicely written. 🙂
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I thought about no way out (or down), concluding with a step out, but thought it should be unsaid, or imagined.
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I imagine these could have been the thoughts of many people imprisoned in towers. Nice job on the san san, too.
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I laid it out in a couple of formats, and this seemed to have the best possibility.
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Oh my, good but so sad. I’d like to think that it never happens but I’m sure many have faced this situation at the end. Too bad.
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Unfortunately for some, happily-ever-after is out of reach.
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A very poignant poem.
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Thank you.
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Heartachingly dark… but beautifully constructed! Thank you.
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My pleasure.
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Wow! Such beautiful words, but so very sad! Great Job KL ❤
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Thank you.
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Dark, but beautifully done.
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🙂
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Loved it!
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Thanks!
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